Bianka Grüneberg-Meyer submitted this photo with the comment “hello hello, here I am in a selfmade dress up on a broken tree on “Urwald” Lovely greetings from Germany”
Lovely greetings back at you, Bianka!  I was in Germany last month and I saw no goths up trees.  I didn’t even see any goths in the general vicinity of a tree (apart from myself, of course, but I don’t count).  Perhaps I missed them because they were, like this lady, wearing earthy tones and were camouflaged.  Either that or goths don’t get up trees on the autobahn, at tourist destinations, or in bars…
I know some of you will be questioning this lady’s gothness due to her outfit. I put it to you that her steampunk-y, Victorian inspired outfit is goth-compatible.  I think you’ll agree that the picture is lovely, though.  She’s a low height in the tree and she’s not smiling.  It’s daylight but she’s in the midst of a scene of beautiful death and decay.
3.7 out of 5 - I think I need to go back to Germany and search a little harder.

Bianka Grüneberg-Meyer submitted this photo with the comment “hello hello, here I am in a selfmade dress up on a broken tree on “Urwald” Lovely greetings from Germany”

Lovely greetings back at you, Bianka!  I was in Germany last month and I saw no goths up trees.  I didn’t even see any goths in the general vicinity of a tree (apart from myself, of course, but I don’t count).  Perhaps I missed them because they were, like this lady, wearing earthy tones and were camouflaged.  Either that or goths don’t get up trees on the autobahn, at tourist destinations, or in bars…

I know some of you will be questioning this lady’s gothness due to her outfit. I put it to you that her steampunk-y, Victorian inspired outfit is goth-compatible.  I think you’ll agree that the picture is lovely, though.  She’s a low height in the tree and she’s not smiling.  It’s daylight but she’s in the midst of a scene of beautiful death and decay.

3.7 out of 5 - I think I need to go back to Germany and search a little harder.

Laura submitted this photo with the comment “Frolicking. :) Full post here.”
Good work, Laura; nicely frolicked.  Initially I read the comment as “frog licking”, which I thought was slightly gross for all concerned but also a potential explanation for the amused look on the goth’s face.   And then I came across this article about a scientist who licks frogs because she loves them.  There’s no mention of whether the frogs appreciate being licked, which I think is an oversight by the National Geographic in an otherwise completely normal article (why do they talk about her hair and height?!)
Sorry, I always get side-tracked by frogs.  This goth is looking relaxed and ready to frolic.  She’s in the shade and she’s a low-medium height up the tree.  Her facial expression is a bit too excited and there’s a lot of pink in her outfit but let’s pretend she’s been licking frogs, which would excuse these things.  Cute hat.
3.7 out of 5 - Lick a psychoactive frog and watch your fridge turn into a prandsome hince.

Laura submitted this photo with the comment “Frolicking. :) Full post here.”

Good work, Laura; nicely frolicked.  Initially I read the comment as “frog licking”, which I thought was slightly gross for all concerned but also a potential explanation for the amused look on the goth’s face.   And then I came across this article about a scientist who licks frogs because she loves them.  There’s no mention of whether the frogs appreciate being licked, which I think is an oversight by the National Geographic in an otherwise completely normal article (why do they talk about her hair and height?!)

Sorry, I always get side-tracked by frogs.  This goth is looking relaxed and ready to frolic.  She’s in the shade and she’s a low-medium height up the tree.  Her facial expression is a bit too excited and there’s a lot of pink in her outfit but let’s pretend she’s been licking frogs, which would excuse these things.  Cute hat.

3.7 out of 5 - Lick a psychoactive frog and watch your fridge turn into a prandsome hince.

Katree McQuade submitted this photo with the comment “Katree in the new forest”
I see Katy has renamed herself to be ‘Katree’ for her submission, for which I give her a short golf clap (or should it be goth clap - although that sounds a lot like a venereal disease contracted in the toilets at goth clubs).  I see she’s in the New Forest which is also goth clap worthy, mostly because it hasn’t been new for a very long time and because one of my favourite childhood books (Children of the New Forest) was based there… at least I assume it was.  I haven’t read it for a million years. Perhaps it was just badly named.
Our goth here is looking far too happy for my liking. She’s low in the tree and she’s out in daylight with too much sun on her pale legs.  Bonus points for cute boots, cute skirt and overall cuteness.  I suggest she looks into fishnets as an option for warm days.
3.7 out of 5 - Symptoms of goth clap: overwhelming desire to turn up to social events and not talk to anyone, inability to draw your eyebrows on to flatter your face, posing for photos wearing naught but gaffa tape, herpes.

Katree McQuade submitted this photo with the comment “Katree in the new forest”

I see Katy has renamed herself to be ‘Katree’ for her submission, for which I give her a short golf clap (or should it be goth clap - although that sounds a lot like a venereal disease contracted in the toilets at goth clubs).  I see she’s in the New Forest which is also goth clap worthy, mostly because it hasn’t been new for a very long time and because one of my favourite childhood books (Children of the New Forest) was based there… at least I assume it was.  I haven’t read it for a million years. Perhaps it was just badly named.

Our goth here is looking far too happy for my liking. She’s low in the tree and she’s out in daylight with too much sun on her pale legs.  Bonus points for cute boots, cute skirt and overall cuteness.  I suggest she looks into fishnets as an option for warm days.

3.7 out of 5 - Symptoms of goth clap: overwhelming desire to turn up to social events and not talk to anyone, inability to draw your eyebrows on to flatter your face, posing for photos wearing naught but gaffa tape, herpes.

Emma & Steph submitted this photo with the comment “Athsmatic goth up a tree”.
What better place to rest during your asthma attack after a long hard day of bow and arrow holding than up a tree?  He’s not high up the tree, with only one foot off the ground, however I imagine he required a bit of stability mid-attack to regain his breath and strength. He’s not smiling but it’s a bit difficult to smile when you’re struggling to breathe. It’s daylight but he’s fully covered including a veil.  What is that veil about, can someone tell me? Is it for bee keeping? Is this a bee-keeping, bow and arrow wielding, asthma suffering goth?
3.7 out of 5 - I hope he recovered OK.  At least he didn’t have to worry about being stung by a bee.
A quick update on the Goths Up Tees: I have reduced the postage costs after shipping some t-shirts this morning and realising that my pricing was all wrong. Huzzah. I have refunded the extra shipping paid to those who bought them yesterday.  People who order t-shirts also now get free stickers so they can stick them on their face like so.  Show me a person who doesn’t love stickers and I will show you a liar (or someone who doesn’t love stickers).

Emma & Steph submitted this photo with the comment “Athsmatic goth up a tree”.

What better place to rest during your asthma attack after a long hard day of bow and arrow holding than up a tree?  He’s not high up the tree, with only one foot off the ground, however I imagine he required a bit of stability mid-attack to regain his breath and strength. He’s not smiling but it’s a bit difficult to smile when you’re struggling to breathe. It’s daylight but he’s fully covered including a veil.  What is that veil about, can someone tell me? Is it for bee keeping? Is this a bee-keeping, bow and arrow wielding, asthma suffering goth?

3.7 out of 5 - I hope he recovered OK.  At least he didn’t have to worry about being stung by a bee.

A quick update on the Goths Up Tees: I have reduced the postage costs after shipping some t-shirts this morning and realising that my pricing was all wrong. Huzzah. I have refunded the extra shipping paid to those who bought them yesterday.  People who order t-shirts also now get free stickers so they can stick them on their face like so.  Show me a person who doesn’t love stickers and I will show you a liar (or someone who doesn’t love stickers).

lostinwitchwood submitted this photo with the comment “Hiya, brilliant blog! This is from  TheOuroboros on Deviant Art, found on Tumblr through dripping-with-alchemy-designs.  Not sure she’s technically ‘up’ the tree though  … :P”
Assuming that her hand and her foot are supporting her weight then, yes, she is up a tree.  ‘That’s unlikely. Surely, she would have broken a nail’, I hear you say.  I agree with you, but she does have a hardcore jointed ring on for added finger structural integrity, as well as superpowers gained from excellent boots and mask.  It is possible that the mound of moss she’s sitting on is actually a ball of tree roots. Let’s go with that.
She’s not far up the tree and it’s day time but she’s not smiling.  Bonus points for the mask and excellent boots.
3.7 out of 5 - It is a well known fact that superpowers are gained from wearing excellent boots. 

lostinwitchwood submitted this photo with the comment “Hiya, brilliant blog! This is from TheOuroboros on Deviant Art, found on Tumblr through dripping-with-alchemy-designs.  Not sure she’s technically ‘up’ the tree though  … :P”

Assuming that her hand and her foot are supporting her weight then, yes, she is up a tree.  ‘That’s unlikely. Surely, she would have broken a nail’, I hear you say.  I agree with you, but she does have a hardcore jointed ring on for added finger structural integrity, as well as superpowers gained from excellent boots and mask.  It is possible that the mound of moss she’s sitting on is actually a ball of tree roots. Let’s go with that.

She’s not far up the tree and it’s day time but she’s not smiling.  Bonus points for the mask and excellent boots.

3.7 out of 5 - It is a well known fact that superpowers are gained from wearing excellent boots. 

Savannah submitted this photo with the comment “My face is naturally in a smile, so I’m sorry but this is my frowny face. Not a very good goth face, but it can’t be helped.”
Yes, my friend, you need to work on your sneer. If you want to practice, just talk to jocks at school and then the sneer will come naturally.  That’s how mine developed and I possess a fine sneer.  A sneer worthy of SONGS, I tell you. 
Apart from her smiley face (that she’s going to have to work on if she wants to be an uber goth some day), she’s a decent height up the tree but it is sunny. I am doubting her commitment to being a goth in general but she’s only young. I’m actively ignoring the goggles.
3.8 out of 5 - Being a good goth up a tree requires commitment and practice, young lady, now GO AND TALK TO A JOCK.

Savannah submitted this photo with the comment “My face is naturally in a smile, so I’m sorry but this is my frowny face. Not a very good goth face, but it can’t be helped.”

Yes, my friend, you need to work on your sneer. If you want to practice, just talk to jocks at school and then the sneer will come naturally.  That’s how mine developed and I possess a fine sneer.  A sneer worthy of SONGS, I tell you.

Apart from her smiley face (that she’s going to have to work on if she wants to be an uber goth some day), she’s a decent height up the tree but it is sunny. I am doubting her commitment to being a goth in general but she’s only young. I’m actively ignoring the goggles.

3.8 out of 5 - Being a good goth up a tree requires commitment and practice, young lady, now GO AND TALK TO A JOCK.

beautifullynonexistant submitted this photo with the comment “The classic double-shot! This is me, modelling for a friend who wanted to try a ‘gothic alice in wonderland’ feel and went completely off on a tangent. I later fell out of that same tree, narrowly missing a huge rock and a broken bottle. Not my usual attire; maybe there’ll be New Rocks and heavy eyeliner in the next submission! - Rachel”
Oh man! Why didn’t you send in an after shot? We could have had the contrast between the lovely blonde corsetted goth playing hide and seek with herself in a charming verdant forest and the fallen goth next to a rock and a broken bottle at the base of the tree.  You could have done a double exposure with that too; one version of you lying prostrate below the tree, and another of yourself sitting up all ruffled and scowling and wielding the broken bottle at the photographer.  *sigh* A moment’s silence for opportunities missed, please.
Only one version of her is up the tree and she doesn’t appear to be very high. Bonus points for creative double exposure.  I like the green tree/blonde hair and pale skin/burgundy and maroon corset and skirt ensemble colour combination. It’s daytime but there’s no smiling.
3.7 out of 5 - Playing hide and seek with yourself up trees is destined to end in tears

beautifullynonexistant submitted this photo with the comment “The classic double-shot! This is me, modelling for a friend who wanted to try a ‘gothic alice in wonderland’ feel and went completely off on a tangent. I later fell out of that same tree, narrowly missing a huge rock and a broken bottle. Not my usual attire; maybe there’ll be New Rocks and heavy eyeliner in the next submission! - Rachel”

Oh man! Why didn’t you send in an after shot? We could have had the contrast between the lovely blonde corsetted goth playing hide and seek with herself in a charming verdant forest and the fallen goth next to a rock and a broken bottle at the base of the tree.  You could have done a double exposure with that too; one version of you lying prostrate below the tree, and another of yourself sitting up all ruffled and scowling and wielding the broken bottle at the photographer.  *sigh* A moment’s silence for opportunities missed, please.

Only one version of her is up the tree and she doesn’t appear to be very high. Bonus points for creative double exposure.  I like the green tree/blonde hair and pale skin/burgundy and maroon corset and skirt ensemble colour combination. It’s daytime but there’s no smiling.

3.7 out of 5 - Playing hide and seek with yourself up trees is destined to end in tears

Barbara Kish submitted this photo with no caption.
Um, is this Bono Gothed up and up a tree? I’m no U2 fan by any stretch of the imagination but a cursory look at their lyrics I found this: “See it driving nails into the souls on the tree of pain” (from ‘Bullet in the Blue Sky’). That sounds like Goth lyrics to me! Are U2 a secret Goth band? I hope not. Bono has looked a bit Goth in the past :-\  I would return my Goth card if that was the case.  BTW, will someone please find me a picture of Trent Reznor up a tree because that would just make my millennium.
At the very least, this is a Goth Bono impersonator up a tree. He’s got himself a nice Lip Service jacket (or is it Tripp - they all look the same in the end) and a fine pair of Bono styled sunglasses. His Bono-esque pose is just missing a microphone.  He has Bono’s self-righteous expression down pat.  It is day light and he’s not far up the tree so points deducted there.
3.7 out of 5 - Where the Goths have no name

Barbara Kish submitted this photo with no caption.

Um, is this Bono Gothed up and up a tree? I’m no U2 fan by any stretch of the imagination but a cursory look at their lyrics I found this: “See it driving nails into the souls on the tree of pain” (from ‘Bullet in the Blue Sky’). That sounds like Goth lyrics to me! Are U2 a secret Goth band? I hope not. Bono has looked a bit Goth in the past :-\  I would return my Goth card if that was the case.  BTW, will someone please find me a picture of Trent Reznor up a tree because that would just make my millennium.

At the very least, this is a Goth Bono impersonator up a tree. He’s got himself a nice Lip Service jacket (or is it Tripp - they all look the same in the end) and a fine pair of Bono styled sunglasses. His Bono-esque pose is just missing a microphone.  He has Bono’s self-righteous expression down pat.  It is day light and he’s not far up the tree so points deducted there.

3.7 out of 5 - Where the Goths have no name