Jerome & Alice submitted this photo with the comment “Waiting to die”
What an appropriately goth way to start the year. Welcome to another year closer to your death, friends. It certainly feels like that for me as I think I’ve woken up with a cracking hangover every day for 2 weeks.  Hell, if you can’t drink away the pain at Christmas, when can you?
Our pictured goths look to be a low-medium height in the tree.  They’re certainly not smiling and they’re mostly out of the sun.  I like the perspective here.  The photographer has the prime up-tree position and has photographed the lower-order goths trying to deal with their hangovers below.
4.7 out of 5 - Communing with trees is an adequate hangover cure but vitamin B is better (with vodka).

Jerome & Alice submitted this photo with the comment “Waiting to die”

What an appropriately goth way to start the year. Welcome to another year closer to your death, friends. It certainly feels like that for me as I think I’ve woken up with a cracking hangover every day for 2 weeks.  Hell, if you can’t drink away the pain at Christmas, when can you?

Our pictured goths look to be a low-medium height in the tree.  They’re certainly not smiling and they’re mostly out of the sun.  I like the perspective here.  The photographer has the prime up-tree position and has photographed the lower-order goths trying to deal with their hangovers below.

4.7 out of 5 - Communing with trees is an adequate hangover cure but vitamin B is better (with vodka).

osirianzen submitted this photo with the comment “Alt. models Osirian and Black Lily as Eric Draven and Harley Quinn. Photo by Barfridge LeStrange”
What the hell is Eric Draven doing fraternising with Harley Quinn during the day (or at any time for that matter)?   Eric’s brooding character suits some up-tree lamentation and I suppose Harley could have decided to tease him about his love of gaffer tape and the way he badly copies her make-up.
It looks like a sunny day, which is quite disappointing. Eric is a decent height up the tree but he’s not smiling. I like that he has gone to the trouble to bring along his guitar.  Harley Quinn appears to be a cyber-gothed up for the occasion. 
4.7 out of 5 - Perhaps Harley is attracted to men who are bad at applying make-up.  I know I am.

osirianzen submitted this photo with the comment “Alt. models Osirian and Black Lily as Eric Draven and Harley Quinn. Photo by Barfridge LeStrange”

What the hell is Eric Draven doing fraternising with Harley Quinn during the day (or at any time for that matter)?   Eric’s brooding character suits some up-tree lamentation and I suppose Harley could have decided to tease him about his love of gaffer tape and the way he badly copies her make-up.

It looks like a sunny day, which is quite disappointing. Eric is a decent height up the tree but he’s not smiling. I like that he has gone to the trouble to bring along his guitar.  Harley Quinn appears to be a cyber-gothed up for the occasion.

4.7 out of 5 - Perhaps Harley is attracted to men who are bad at applying make-up.  I know I am.

Elaine Valerie Rauhöft submitted this photo with the comment:

"This is my Goth up a tree. My daughter Hope has spent many hours in this tree throughout her life and I witnessed her gradual metamorphosis from child tree climber to Treegoth with great interest.  This tree was her refuge and friend and even though she has grown up now, it still is. This dress took us 2 years to sew and we took these pictures when it was finally finished in May 2013."

If I had an actual heart rather than a beautifully carved ice replica, this story of a girl growing with her tree into goth-hood would warm it. Instead, my ice replica heart crunched a bit in irritation because it didn’t understand why a dress would take 2 years to make. 
Dress construction time aside, this is a lovely photo of a goth up a tree.  She’s high up the tree, she’s not smiling and her 2 year old dress is displayed to it’s fullest drapey capacity. It’s daylight but she’s in the shade. 
4.7 out of 5 - Sometimes my ice replica heart and my vodka addled brain have disagreements ending in delicious slushies. 

Elaine Valerie Rauhöft submitted this photo with the comment:

"This is my Goth up a tree. My daughter Hope has spent many hours in this tree throughout her life and I witnessed her gradual metamorphosis from child tree climber to Treegoth with great interest.  This tree was her refuge and friend and even though she has grown up now, it still is. This dress took us 2 years to sew and we took these pictures when it was finally finished in May 2013."

If I had an actual heart rather than a beautifully carved ice replica, this story of a girl growing with her tree into goth-hood would warm it. Instead, my ice replica heart crunched a bit in irritation because it didn’t understand why a dress would take 2 years to make. 

Dress construction time aside, this is a lovely photo of a goth up a tree.  She’s high up the tree, she’s not smiling and her 2 year old dress is displayed to it’s fullest drapey capacity. It’s daylight but she’s in the shade. 

4.7 out of 5 - Sometimes my ice replica heart and my vodka addled brain have disagreements ending in delicious slushies. 

croserun submitted this photo with the comment “It was 2003.  I was underage and convinced that oversized hoodies were the height of fashion.  I stood in a tree in a corset, my friend perched above me.  WE ARE GOTHS.”
I like how adamant she is that she and her friend are goths.  Gone are the days when goths refused to be labelled. “No we’re not goths, we’re unique individuals who reject your tedious subculture stereotypes! We just like wearing black, damnit.”  I have actual medical proof that I am a goth, as I just got some test results back that show that I’m severely vitamin D deficient.  How does one become vitamin D deficient, I hear you ask? LACK OF SUNLIGHT. HA! Proof of goth!
They’re a decent height up the tree and they’re not smiling. It’s a cold and gloomy looking day, perfect for working on your vitamin D deficiency.  They’re wearing the kind of outfits I would have worn in 2003, so bonus points there. 
4.7 out of 5 - They should print your vitamin D status on goth cards for proof of gothness.

croserun submitted this photo with the comment “It was 2003.  I was underage and convinced that oversized hoodies were the height of fashion.  I stood in a tree in a corset, my friend perched above me.  WE ARE GOTHS.”

I like how adamant she is that she and her friend are goths.  Gone are the days when goths refused to be labelled. “No we’re not goths, we’re unique individuals who reject your tedious subculture stereotypes! We just like wearing black, damnit.”  I have actual medical proof that I am a goth, as I just got some test results back that show that I’m severely vitamin D deficient.  How does one become vitamin D deficient, I hear you ask? LACK OF SUNLIGHT. HA! Proof of goth!

They’re a decent height up the tree and they’re not smiling. It’s a cold and gloomy looking day, perfect for working on your vitamin D deficiency.  They’re wearing the kind of outfits I would have worn in 2003, so bonus points there.

4.7 out of 5 - They should print your vitamin D status on goth cards for proof of gothness.

Stein submitted this photo with the comment “Saw this tree when I went to Suomenlinna just outside Helsinki, and could not resist climbing it :D”
I’m imagining this guy being drawn towards the tree against his will, trying desperately to resist and then just surrendering himself in a flurry of leaves, bondage straps and spikes.  He looks a bit happy about surrendering to the tree but I think we’d all be pretty impressed about being up a tree in a bloody great sea fortress in Finland. 
Our goth boy has managed to climb to a good height up the tree without snagging his bondage straps or messing up his hair. He’s mostly in the shade despite the daylight.  He isn’t really smiling but he does look pretty happy with himself for making a rude hand gesture (or is he pretending he has scissors for fingers - I AM EDWARD SCISSOR HANDS).
4.7 out of 4 - Goths Up Trees: the least informative goth travel blog ever.

Stein submitted this photo with the comment “Saw this tree when I went to Suomenlinna just outside Helsinki, and could not resist climbing it :D”

I’m imagining this guy being drawn towards the tree against his will, trying desperately to resist and then just surrendering himself in a flurry of leaves, bondage straps and spikes.  He looks a bit happy about surrendering to the tree but I think we’d all be pretty impressed about being up a tree in a bloody great sea fortress in Finland. 

Our goth boy has managed to climb to a good height up the tree without snagging his bondage straps or messing up his hair. He’s mostly in the shade despite the daylight.  He isn’t really smiling but he does look pretty happy with himself for making a rude hand gesture (or is he pretending he has scissors for fingers - I AM EDWARD SCISSOR HANDS).

4.7 out of 4 - Goths Up Trees: the least informative goth travel blog ever.

 lauren krothe submitted this photo with the comment “i’m a singer-composer named lauren krothe, and in my most recent music video, a morbid tale of death and rebirth entitled “a darker side,” i managed to find my way up a tree. see for yourself! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSjfkzAfv6Q”
This alluring goth lady is in love with a darker side, as she declares in her music video, and decided that the best way to express that love was to sing about it while up a tree.  Obviously, I agree that’s the most effective method of communication of dark-side love. In the video she looks pretty happy about it but luckily in this photo she has restrained her joy a bit.  She’s high up the tree and she’s nicely gothed up for a bit of up-tree singing.  It’s daylight but she’s in the shade.  Bonus points for incorporating being a goth up a tree into a music video.  There should be more of it.
4.7 out of 5 - Sing it from the tree tops… or from mid-tree

lauren krothe submitted this photo with the comment “i’m a singer-composer named lauren krothe, and in my most recent music video, a morbid tale of death and rebirth entitled “a darker side,” i managed to find my way up a tree. see for yourself! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSjfkzAfv6Q”

This alluring goth lady is in love with a darker side, as she declares in her music video, and decided that the best way to express that love was to sing about it while up a tree.  Obviously, I agree that’s the most effective method of communication of dark-side love. In the video she looks pretty happy about it but luckily in this photo she has restrained her joy a bit.  She’s high up the tree and she’s nicely gothed up for a bit of up-tree singing.  It’s daylight but she’s in the shade.  Bonus points for incorporating being a goth up a tree into a music video.  There should be more of it.

4.7 out of 5 - Sing it from the tree tops… or from mid-tree

everything-in-ashes submitted this photo with the comment “Photo taken by me, thought it might fit!”
You’re right, friend, it does fit.  Here we have a very pretty goth kneeling (?!) up a tree.  Kneeling up a tree must be painful.  Perhaps if you have horns attached to your head you don’t feel pain.  I’ll have to try it.  She’s high up the tree, she’s not smiling and, as you should bloody well know by now, I love blonde goths. She’s out in daylight but she’s oblivious to things like the sun and knee pain.
4.7 out of 5 - Perhaps she has secret knee pads that aren’t visible in the photo (or perhaps I’m a bit over sensitive about knees)

everything-in-ashes submitted this photo with the comment “Photo taken by me, thought it might fit!”

You’re right, friend, it does fit.  Here we have a very pretty goth kneeling (?!) up a tree.  Kneeling up a tree must be painful.  Perhaps if you have horns attached to your head you don’t feel pain.  I’ll have to try it.  She’s high up the tree, she’s not smiling and, as you should bloody well know by now, I love blonde goths. She’s out in daylight but she’s oblivious to things like the sun and knee pain.

4.7 out of 5 - Perhaps she has secret knee pads that aren’t visible in the photo (or perhaps I’m a bit over sensitive about knees)

sociallyawkwardpanda submitted this photo with the comment “This photo is actually a picture of me from 2008. A friend of mine had a senior photography project to do, so she threw me into a dusty old wedding gown and made me climb into some fairly uncomfortable tree canopies. My apologies for the white gown; I realize it’s not very goth.”
Where would I be without people who take ye olde photos of goths up trees for photography projects? Yeah, probably the same place I am now, but with less random t-shirts in my house (you should make them leave my house - there’s 30% off*!)
Here we have yet another apologetic goth.  There’s no need to apologise for white dresses, friends.  I have posted several goths in white dresses in the past and I am a fan.  I appreciate the light and shade in this photo and the way the goth’s dress is caught in the branches and twigs of her nest.  She’s not smiling and she seems high in the tree. It’s daylight but she’s mostly in the shade.
4.7 out of 5 - I want to quote Marla Singer from Fight Club but she was talking about bridesmaid’s dresses not wedding dresses so it doesn’t work. 

* Use discount code: 100percentgoth

sociallyawkwardpanda submitted this photo with the comment “This photo is actually a picture of me from 2008. A friend of mine had a senior photography project to do, so she threw me into a dusty old wedding gown and made me climb into some fairly uncomfortable tree canopies. My apologies for the white gown; I realize it’s not very goth.”

Where would I be without people who take ye olde photos of goths up trees for photography projects? Yeah, probably the same place I am now, but with less random t-shirts in my house (you should make them leave my house - there’s 30% off*!)

Here we have yet another apologetic goth.  There’s no need to apologise for white dresses, friends.  I have posted several goths in white dresses in the past and I am a fan.  I appreciate the light and shade in this photo and the way the goth’s dress is caught in the branches and twigs of her nest.  She’s not smiling and she seems high in the tree. It’s daylight but she’s mostly in the shade.

4.7 out of 5 - I want to quote Marla Singer from Fight Club but she was talking about bridesmaid’s dresses not wedding dresses so it doesn’t work. 

* Use discount code: 100percentgoth

kitty-katya submitted this photo with the comment “Here’s me at the uni ball last night after a little too much red wine. What you can’t see is this is in the cloisters of an old monastery.”
It’s true, I can’t see cloisters of an old monastery.  I also can’t see an unsmiling goth, a goth high up a tree, fairies, a bottle of absinthe, a plate of fish and chips, or a cemetery,   I would like to see all of those things right now.  However, I can see a lush goth (or a goth lush?) draped over a sparkly fairy-light laden tree.  Yes, she looks to have a smile on her face, but it’s the smile of the pleasantly drunk, so I’ll allow it. She hasn’t made much effort height-wise but there is always the chance of electrocution with fairy lights and no one likes to smell a crispy drunk goth (it’s all vinegar, patchouli, and chicken).  Nice boots, dress and mask.  Pity about the blurriness but bonus points for the night shot.
4.7 out of 5 - I’ve tried to pose drunk up a tree without smiling and even I struggle.

kitty-katya submitted this photo with the comment “Here’s me at the uni ball last night after a little too much red wine. What you can’t see is this is in the cloisters of an old monastery.”

It’s true, I can’t see cloisters of an old monastery.  I also can’t see an unsmiling goth, a goth high up a tree, fairies, a bottle of absinthe, a plate of fish and chips, or a cemetery,   I would like to see all of those things right now.  However, I can see a lush goth (or a goth lush?) draped over a sparkly fairy-light laden tree.  Yes, she looks to have a smile on her face, but it’s the smile of the pleasantly drunk, so I’ll allow it. She hasn’t made much effort height-wise but there is always the chance of electrocution with fairy lights and no one likes to smell a crispy drunk goth (it’s all vinegar, patchouli, and chicken).  Nice boots, dress and mask.  Pity about the blurriness but bonus points for the night shot.

4.7 out of 5 - I’ve tried to pose drunk up a tree without smiling and even I struggle.

Emma Robson submitted this photo with the comment “My friends and I went to see Emilie Autumn the other day and took some photos beforehand~ (yes it is in the middle of the day but that’s only because we got to the line really early).  Also this was taken in a cemetery with graves from the 1800’s, if that makes up for it being day-time”
I like this submission because the photographer chose to include a large portion of the tree trunk instead of the including all of the goth in the top left corner and/or any of the alleged gravestones near the tree.  I suspect that the photographer was in an uncooperative mood due an Emilie Autumn inspired tea-rage pre-gig incident.  Understandable, but annoying.
The goths are high up the tree and they’re not smiling.  It’s daytime but they’re in the shade.   Bonus points for the fully visible goth’s cute and practical gig outfit and for climbing in heels. I wish I could see more of the top goth but, thanks to the photographer, that’s not possible. 
4.7 out of 5 - Having photos up trees before going to see a band is a splendid idea.  Having photos with the band up trees is a spectacular idea.

Emma Robson submitted this photo with the comment “My friends and I went to see Emilie Autumn the other day and took some photos beforehand~ (yes it is in the middle of the day but that’s only because we got to the line really early).  Also this was taken in a cemetery with graves from the 1800’s, if that makes up for it being day-time”

I like this submission because the photographer chose to include a large portion of the tree trunk instead of the including all of the goth in the top left corner and/or any of the alleged gravestones near the tree.  I suspect that the photographer was in an uncooperative mood due an Emilie Autumn inspired tea-rage pre-gig incident.  Understandable, but annoying.

The goths are high up the tree and they’re not smiling.  It’s daytime but they’re in the shade.   Bonus points for the fully visible goth’s cute and practical gig outfit and for climbing in heels. I wish I could see more of the top goth but, thanks to the photographer, that’s not possible. 

4.7 out of 5 - Having photos up trees before going to see a band is a splendid idea.  Having photos with the band up trees is a spectacular idea.

Charlotte Johnson submitted this photo with the comment “Forget the Prime Meridian, go to Greenwich for the trees.”
I’m going to take your advice, Charlotte.  I’m going to Greenwich in September and I’m going to find THIS TREE or ONE LIKE IT, because that is an amazing tree.  That is also an amazing pose; sort of half seated/half standing, regal yet ready for action on the trunk of the tree. I very much like the finger splaying, dramatic cloak spreading and head position.  It’s a gloomy day, the backdrop of skeletal trees is pleasing, and she’s not smiling.  She’s looking suitably dark yet warm. 
4.7 out of 5 - When in Greenwich, spend the longitude of your time with the trees (*sigh* I tried)

P.S. In serious goth news, in Manchester they’re treating violence against people of alternative subcultures (goths, emos, metallers etc.) as hate crimes, aided by the work of the Sophie Lancaster Foundation.  I have experienced occasional negative attention for being a goth such as verbal abuse, discrimination, and drunken fools who think it’s funny to make fun of goths in dodgy food joints at 3am *tiny mournful violins*, but I’ve never experienced violence.  I was upset to learn that our Manchester alt friends do not feel safe in public to express themselves through the way they look and are being specifically targeted for looking alternative.  The change in Manchester Police’s policy sounds like a positive step and I hope it helps reduce abuse because no one should be abused for looking differently (or abused at all, for that matter).  GROUP HUG. </serious>

Charlotte Johnson submitted this photo with the comment “Forget the Prime Meridian, go to Greenwich for the trees.”

I’m going to take your advice, Charlotte.  I’m going to Greenwich in September and I’m going to find THIS TREE or ONE LIKE IT, because that is an amazing tree.  That is also an amazing pose; sort of half seated/half standing, regal yet ready for action on the trunk of the tree. I very much like the finger splaying, dramatic cloak spreading and head position.  It’s a gloomy day, the backdrop of skeletal trees is pleasing, and she’s not smiling.  She’s looking suitably dark yet warm. 

4.7 out of 5 - When in Greenwich, spend the longitude of your time with the trees (*sigh* I tried)

P.S. In serious goth news, in Manchester they’re treating violence against people of alternative subcultures (goths, emos, metallers etc.) as hate crimes, aided by the work of the Sophie Lancaster Foundation.  I have experienced occasional negative attention for being a goth such as verbal abuse, discrimination, and drunken fools who think it’s funny to make fun of goths in dodgy food joints at 3am *tiny mournful violins*, but I’ve never experienced violence.  I was upset to learn that our Manchester alt friends do not feel safe in public to express themselves through the way they look and are being specifically targeted for looking alternative.  The change in Manchester Police’s policy sounds like a positive step and I hope it helps reduce abuse because no one should be abused for looking differently (or abused at all, for that matter).  GROUP HUG. </serious>

nemotheviking submitted this photo with no comment.
Our young gothlings here have gone to the trouble of showing us two aspects of their up-tree escapades: one demonstrating one goth cavorting on a branch with a friendly supporting cast member leaning on the same branch, and the other showing the excellent up-tree height a goth has achieved.  Using my (currently wine-impaired) powers of observation, it looks like there are three separate goths in two separate photos.  DILEMMA.  I suppose I&#8217;ll have to judge the submission as a whole. 
So, of the up-trees, there&#8217;s no real smiling but there&#8217;s definite amusement in the left goth.  The right goth is high up the tree and the left goth is medium-high.   They&#8217;re out in daylight but it&#8217;s not sunny and they&#8217;re well covered up.  Bonus points for cute outfits, boots and hair.   The supporting cast member looks surlier than the up-trees, which is disappointing.  
4.7 out of 5 - Please ensure your supporting cast member&#8217;s surliness levels are not greater than your up-tree&#8217;s

nemotheviking submitted this photo with no comment.

Our young gothlings here have gone to the trouble of showing us two aspects of their up-tree escapades: one demonstrating one goth cavorting on a branch with a friendly supporting cast member leaning on the same branch, and the other showing the excellent up-tree height a goth has achieved.  Using my (currently wine-impaired) powers of observation, it looks like there are three separate goths in two separate photos.  DILEMMA.  I suppose I’ll have to judge the submission as a whole.

So, of the up-trees, there’s no real smiling but there’s definite amusement in the left goth.  The right goth is high up the tree and the left goth is medium-high.   They’re out in daylight but it’s not sunny and they’re well covered up.  Bonus points for cute outfits, boots and hair.   The supporting cast member looks surlier than the up-trees, which is disappointing. 

4.7 out of 5 - Please ensure your supporting cast member’s surliness levels are not greater than your up-tree’s

lonelygothgirl submitted this photo with no comment.
Because my neck was getting tired and my colleagues started mistaking me for a stroke victim, I rotated this photo for your viewing pleasure here.  
I very much like this photo despite the neck-pain inducing angle it was taken on.  The backdrop is very picturesque and suitably cold looking.  The stream looks murky and potentially full of decaying animal carcases.   Our goth isn&#8217;t smiling and she&#8217;s high up the tree and in the shade.  She&#8217;s making excellent use of black lipstick and she&#8217;s wearing fetching goth-casual (gothsual) tree-climbing attire.
4.7 out of 5 - I would have given her more points if she hadn&#8217;t been so intent on causing me physical pain.

lonelygothgirl submitted this photo with no comment.

Because my neck was getting tired and my colleagues started mistaking me for a stroke victim, I rotated this photo for your viewing pleasure here. 

I very much like this photo despite the neck-pain inducing angle it was taken on.  The backdrop is very picturesque and suitably cold looking.  The stream looks murky and potentially full of decaying animal carcases.   Our goth isn’t smiling and she’s high up the tree and in the shade.  She’s making excellent use of black lipstick and she’s wearing fetching goth-casual (gothsual) tree-climbing attire.

4.7 out of 5 - I would have given her more points if she hadn’t been so intent on causing me physical pain.

etherealrose submitted this photo with the comment &#8220;This was taken at a Moonlight Soirée that I hosted recently. I was dubbed a tree troll, complete with branch moustache.&#8221;
Branch moustaches are the new, gother version of the tired old hipster finger moustache!  However, the day a goth tattoos a branch moustache onto their finger is the day I start wearing baby pink tracksuits with &#8220;Roxy&#8221; written across the arse with an ill-fitting singlet, get a fake tan, and change my name to Chantelle.
This goth is looking very relaxed at her soirée.  It&#8217;s night time and she appears to be a lowish height up the tree.  I love her silvery hair and massive necklace.  I hope I have this wrong, but it looks like she has a goth tracksuit on.  Is she one of those fabled SportsGoths™?  Is she relaxing up a tree after a swift jog around the moonlit forest?  I don&#8217;t know.  She&#8217;s not smiling.  Bonus points for using the tree as an accessory.
4.7 out of 5 - No one is allowed to get a branch moustache tattooed on their finger. 

etherealrose submitted this photo with the comment “This was taken at a Moonlight Soirée that I hosted recently. I was dubbed a tree troll, complete with branch moustache.”

Branch moustaches are the new, gother version of the tired old hipster finger moustache!  However, the day a goth tattoos a branch moustache onto their finger is the day I start wearing baby pink tracksuits with “Roxy” written across the arse with an ill-fitting singlet, get a fake tan, and change my name to Chantelle.

This goth is looking very relaxed at her soirée.  It’s night time and she appears to be a lowish height up the tree.  I love her silvery hair and massive necklace.  I hope I have this wrong, but it looks like she has a goth tracksuit on.  Is she one of those fabled SportsGoths™?  Is she relaxing up a tree after a swift jog around the moonlit forest?  I don’t know.  She’s not smiling.  Bonus points for using the tree as an accessory.

4.7 out of 5 - No one is allowed to get a branch moustache tattooed on their finger. 

haploschaffer submitted this photo with the comment &#8220;I did this pic specially for this tumblr :D.&#8221;
It&#8217;s heart-warming to know that there are goth boys in the world doing things especially for me.  Unfortunately, my cold dead heart isn&#8217;t used to sudden changes in temperature and I have been forced to try and bring it back to normal by sitting in the toilet at work and reciting poetry about how I am actually alone in this vast frigid abyss even if people are taking photos of themselves up trees for me.
Our fine goth boy is high up a tree in a pleasantly decay-filled autumnal setting.  He&#8217;s not smiling (just) and he&#8217;s mostly covered from the sun&#8217;s evil rays. Bonus points for outfit excellence.
4.7 out of 5 - Warming the heart of a goth isn&#8217;t advisable unless you want them to move away from you in a rapid fashion.

haploschaffer submitted this photo with the comment “I did this pic specially for this tumblr :D.”

It’s heart-warming to know that there are goth boys in the world doing things especially for me.  Unfortunately, my cold dead heart isn’t used to sudden changes in temperature and I have been forced to try and bring it back to normal by sitting in the toilet at work and reciting poetry about how I am actually alone in this vast frigid abyss even if people are taking photos of themselves up trees for me.

Our fine goth boy is high up a tree in a pleasantly decay-filled autumnal setting.  He’s not smiling (just) and he’s mostly covered from the sun’s evil rays. Bonus points for outfit excellence.

4.7 out of 5 - Warming the heart of a goth isn’t advisable unless you want them to move away from you in a rapid fashion.