everything-in-ashes submitted this photo with the comment “Photo taken by me, thought it might fit!”
You’re right, friend, it does fit.  Here we have a very pretty goth kneeling (?!) up a tree.  Kneeling up a tree must be painful.  Perhaps if you have horns attached to your head you don’t feel pain.  I’ll have to try it.  She’s high up the tree, she’s not smiling and, as you should bloody well know by now, I love blonde goths. She’s out in daylight but she’s oblivious to things like the sun and knee pain.
4.7 out of 5 - Perhaps she has secret knee pads that aren’t visible in the photo (or perhaps I’m a bit over sensitive about knees)

everything-in-ashes submitted this photo with the comment “Photo taken by me, thought it might fit!”

You’re right, friend, it does fit.  Here we have a very pretty goth kneeling (?!) up a tree.  Kneeling up a tree must be painful.  Perhaps if you have horns attached to your head you don’t feel pain.  I’ll have to try it.  She’s high up the tree, she’s not smiling and, as you should bloody well know by now, I love blonde goths. She’s out in daylight but she’s oblivious to things like the sun and knee pain.

4.7 out of 5 - Perhaps she has secret knee pads that aren’t visible in the photo (or perhaps I’m a bit over sensitive about knees)

Davey Pebb submitted this photo with the comment “May not be traditional make-up, but he is certainly a goth and he is up a tree.”
How can we tell that this guy is certainly a goth? He does appear to have blood dripping out of his mouth but that doesn’t automatically indicate gothness. He looks a bit too tanned and too used to wearing jeans for my liking.  I’d say this guy looks like surfer who decided to climb a tree after a particularly painful trip to the dentist. 
Yes, he’s high up a tree and he’s not smiling.  Bonus points for blood trickle and vampiric tendencies.  Points deducted for jean shorts and sun exposure.
3 out of 5 - Yeah, I climb trees topless and shoeless after visiting the dentist. What of it?

Davey Pebb submitted this photo with the comment “May not be traditional make-up, but he is certainly a goth and he is up a tree.”

How can we tell that this guy is certainly a goth? He does appear to have blood dripping out of his mouth but that doesn’t automatically indicate gothness. He looks a bit too tanned and too used to wearing jeans for my liking.  I’d say this guy looks like surfer who decided to climb a tree after a particularly painful trip to the dentist. 

Yes, he’s high up a tree and he’s not smiling.  Bonus points for blood trickle and vampiric tendencies.  Points deducted for jean shorts and sun exposure.

3 out of 5 - Yeah, I climb trees topless and shoeless after visiting the dentist. What of it?

gothpage submitted this photo with the comment:

"Hey, I’m Oliver! I am the owner and run Goth Page. A few of my friends have submitted their photos so I thought why not. I am a lover for Deathrock and Goth Rock, the music so relaxing and just has a great sound to it.  I am also trying to brake into the modelling world and I’m trying to get my name out there for photographers etc, so if you like my look and you’re living in Norfolk, then please drop me a message in my inbox. Anyway if you would like to follow me on Twitter then my name is Gothly_Guy.”

Excellent pose, Oliver, and a dodgy bit of shameless self-promotion.  Here is a list of the things I love about this photo:
fabulous extension across the branch;
the pose looks comfortable and displays the legs well;
I love me a blonde goth;
interesting graffiti on the tree (um, does that say ‘baby’?);
he looks high up the tree;
appealing ‘hello ladies’ look (and not smiling);
excellent New Rocks, stripy pants, gloves, and strategic rips in his unidentified print t-shirt (I want it to be something as excellent as 3 Wolves Howling at the Moon but I don’t think it is).
Unfortunately, it’s day time but we can’t have everything.
4.9 out of 5 - If he’s allowed to shamelessly self-promote then so am I: buy my t-shirts!  I swear they will improve your wardrobe immeasurably.

gothpage submitted this photo with the comment:

"Hey, I’m Oliver! I am the owner and run Goth Page. A few of my friends have submitted their photos so I thought why not. I am a lover for Deathrock and Goth Rock, the music so relaxing and just has a great sound to it.  I am also trying to brake into the modelling world and I’m trying to get my name out there for photographers etc, so if you like my look and you’re living in Norfolk, then please drop me a message in my inbox. Anyway if you would like to follow me on Twitter then my name is Gothly_Guy.”

Excellent pose, Oliver, and a dodgy bit of shameless self-promotion.  Here is a list of the things I love about this photo:

  • fabulous extension across the branch;
  • the pose looks comfortable and displays the legs well;
  • I love me a blonde goth;
  • interesting graffiti on the tree (um, does that say ‘baby’?);
  • he looks high up the tree;
  • appealing ‘hello ladies’ look (and not smiling);
  • excellent New Rocks, stripy pants, gloves, and strategic rips in his unidentified print t-shirt (I want it to be something as excellent as 3 Wolves Howling at the Moon but I don’t think it is).

Unfortunately, it’s day time but we can’t have everything.

4.9 out of 5 - If he’s allowed to shamelessly self-promote then so am I: buy my t-shirts!  I swear they will improve your wardrobe immeasurably.

badteenagekicks submitted this photo with the comment “I went for the Australian horror flick look so that you might imagine a giant razorback or deranged alcoholic rampaging into shot at any second.”
This is an up-tree pose we haven’t seen before and I like it. I may be slightly biased because this is a very Australian looking scene (the landscape, not the girl flung over a tree trunk) and it makes me feel patriotic.  It’s probably wrong that I feel patriotic about a photo of someone pretending to be dead but I’m not interested in the Olympics (all that sport!) and I feel I should support my country somehow.
The up-tree doesn’t look overly goth but there’s a dark dress, some boots and she made some horror flick references so I’m going to post it anyway.  She’s high up the tree and I doubt she’s smiling. It’s day time but deranged alcoholic serial killers are most active during the day light.
3.8 out of 5 - If goths posing up trees was an olympic sport I’d watch the shit out of it.

badteenagekicks submitted this photo with the comment “I went for the Australian horror flick look so that you might imagine a giant razorback or deranged alcoholic rampaging into shot at any second.”

This is an up-tree pose we haven’t seen before and I like it. I may be slightly biased because this is a very Australian looking scene (the landscape, not the girl flung over a tree trunk) and it makes me feel patriotic.  It’s probably wrong that I feel patriotic about a photo of someone pretending to be dead but I’m not interested in the Olympics (all that sport!) and I feel I should support my country somehow.

The up-tree doesn’t look overly goth but there’s a dark dress, some boots and she made some horror flick references so I’m going to post it anyway.  She’s high up the tree and I doubt she’s smiling. It’s day time but deranged alcoholic serial killers are most active during the day light.

3.8 out of 5 - If goths posing up trees was an olympic sport I’d watch the shit out of it.

Edward submitted this photo with no comment.
This poor girl looks like she lost her skirt on the way home from the local zombie march and decided to have a little rest up a tree after a long hard day of lurching.  Actually, it kind of looks like she’s lying in a nest like a little half-clothed zombie bird.
I like her cold, dead, white iris-ed zombie stare.  She appears to be a reasonable height up the tree.  It’s daylight but there’s a lot of shade.  I hope she finds her skirt because if she doesn’t she may contract a case of dreaded chilly-arse on the lurch home.
4.5 out of 5 - Try not to lurch out of your skirt.

Edward submitted this photo with no comment.

This poor girl looks like she lost her skirt on the way home from the local zombie march and decided to have a little rest up a tree after a long hard day of lurching.  Actually, it kind of looks like she’s lying in a nest like a little half-clothed zombie bird.

I like her cold, dead, white iris-ed zombie stare.  She appears to be a reasonable height up the tree.  It’s daylight but there’s a lot of shade.  I hope she finds her skirt because if she doesn’t she may contract a case of dreaded chilly-arse on the lurch home.

4.5 out of 5 - Try not to lurch out of your skirt.

Toria submitted this photo with no comment. 
Yes! A well-dressed sun-conscious goth up a tree in a graveyard.  That’s what I like to see! I very much like her creative eye makeup and nose chain.  I’ve always been too scared that I’d get a chain like that caught on my wrist spikes and rip out a piercing in a painful hair brushing incident to attempt such facial decoration.  I appreciate it when others do it because I can admire it without the hair brushing fear.
This goth is quite high up the tree and she’s not smiling. Bonus points, of course, for being in a graveyard.  It’s daytime but she has demonstrated sun-consciousness by wielding a parasol.
4.9 out of 5 - Fearless hair brushing goths should all wear nose chains to enable their ears to hear their noses better.

Toria submitted this photo with no comment. 

Yes! A well-dressed sun-conscious goth up a tree in a graveyard.  That’s what I like to see! I very much like her creative eye makeup and nose chain.  I’ve always been too scared that I’d get a chain like that caught on my wrist spikes and rip out a piercing in a painful hair brushing incident to attempt such facial decoration.  I appreciate it when others do it because I can admire it without the hair brushing fear.

This goth is quite high up the tree and she’s not smiling. Bonus points, of course, for being in a graveyard.  It’s daytime but she has demonstrated sun-consciousness by wielding a parasol.

4.9 out of 5 - Fearless hair brushing goths should all wear nose chains to enable their ears to hear their noses better.

puellaprava submitted this photo with no comment.
What we have here is a shy goth riding an extraordinarily long elephant’s trunk through a dead forest.   Don’t be shy! We blonde goths should hold our heads high, especially when we’re pretending to ride imaginary beasts through dead forests!  Pretend you’re Daenerys Targaryen!  That’s what I do.  People look at me strangely when I start yelling things about taking what is mine through fire and blood but sometimes you need to take drastic measures to ensure you get your fair share of popcorn. 
I’m going to have to guess that this goth isn’t smiling. She’s quite high up her trunk.  It’s a dull looking cold day but it is still daytime, damnit.
4.5 out of 5 - Call upon your inner Daenarys when riding your imaginary elephant trunk. It’s better than pretending you’re Cersei.

puellaprava submitted this photo with no comment.

What we have here is a shy goth riding an extraordinarily long elephant’s trunk through a dead forest.   Don’t be shy! We blonde goths should hold our heads high, especially when we’re pretending to ride imaginary beasts through dead forests!  Pretend you’re Daenerys Targaryen!  That’s what I do.  People look at me strangely when I start yelling things about taking what is mine through fire and blood but sometimes you need to take drastic measures to ensure you get your fair share of popcorn. 

I’m going to have to guess that this goth isn’t smiling. She’s quite high up her trunk.  It’s a dull looking cold day but it is still daytime, damnit.

4.5 out of 5 - Call upon your inner Daenarys when riding your imaginary elephant trunk. It’s better than pretending you’re Cersei.

thecuriousmagpie submitted this photo with the comment “I went for a gothic night time picnic with my boyfriend at the weekend and being appropriately dressed in a park with woods at night meant I had no excuse not to have a photo taken up a tree! The problem was finding a suitable tree, most of them were spindly little things, this was the best I could find and the highest up I could get (about 2m). I did have a black velvet cloak too (it was about 10°C) but that was just a bit too impractical for climbing…”
I will now extol the virtues of this photo: 
it’s night time, 
there’s no smiling and she’s staring at the night sky longingly, 
she’s high up the tree, 
she’s wearing rockingly rad red boots (who’s in the mood for alliteration? ME) as well as velvet and lace, and 
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I love me a blonde goth. 
I would have liked to see the black velvet cloak mentioned but never mind.  It makes me happy that she’s braved the cold and searched out a decent tree and hiked up there without a thought to potentially snagging her outfit on the bark.
5 out of 5 - If you haven’t had a gothic night time picnic that has resulted in a 5 rating up tree photo YOU HAVEN’T LIVED.

thecuriousmagpie submitted this photo with the comment “I went for a gothic night time picnic with my boyfriend at the weekend and being appropriately dressed in a park with woods at night meant I had no excuse not to have a photo taken up a tree! The problem was finding a suitable tree, most of them were spindly little things, this was the best I could find and the highest up I could get (about 2m). I did have a black velvet cloak too (it was about 10°C) but that was just a bit too impractical for climbing…”

I will now extol the virtues of this photo:

  • it’s night time,
  • there’s no smiling and she’s staring at the night sky longingly,
  • she’s high up the tree,
  • she’s wearing rockingly rad red boots (who’s in the mood for alliteration? ME) as well as velvet and lace, and
  • I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I love me a blonde goth.

I would have liked to see the black velvet cloak mentioned but never mind.  It makes me happy that she’s braved the cold and searched out a decent tree and hiked up there without a thought to potentially snagging her outfit on the bark.

5 out of 5 - If you haven’t had a gothic night time picnic that has resulted in a 5 rating up tree photo YOU HAVEN’T LIVED.

Marina submitted this photo with the comment “Me in the tree! got the idea about 2007. sorry for the quality, my little brother done this photo. But when I heard about this page, I was thinking of this Photo :P  I know, maby its to blurred. greetings from Germany”
Guten tag, friends from Germany! Danke for the tiny picture. I wish it was grosse.  That’s about the extent of my German vocabulary after several years of studying German in primary school and visiting Germany once (oh, and all the broken German lyrics of Hanzel Und Gretyl songs) so, I apologise profusely.
Even though this photo is small, I think we can appreciate this goth’s outfit sufficiently.  I love me a blonde goth; hell, we blondes are the true alternative goths, at least that’s what I tell myself.  I like her vest, necklaces and belt. I don’t think we see enough lady goths in vests.  It’s daylight and she looks quite high in the tree yet slightly amused; like she’s going to let go at any moment and land on us in a ‘stacks on' type move.
3.4 out of 5 - Kann ich bitte ein größeres Foto?

Marina submitted this photo with the comment “Me in the tree! got the idea about 2007. sorry for the quality, my little brother done this photo. But when I heard about this page, I was thinking of this Photo :P  I know, maby its to blurred. greetings from Germany”

Guten tag, friends from Germany! Danke for the tiny picture. I wish it was grosse.  That’s about the extent of my German vocabulary after several years of studying German in primary school and visiting Germany once (oh, and all the broken German lyrics of Hanzel Und Gretyl songs) so, I apologise profusely.

Even though this photo is small, I think we can appreciate this goth’s outfit sufficiently.  I love me a blonde goth; hell, we blondes are the true alternative goths, at least that’s what I tell myself.  I like her vest, necklaces and belt. I don’t think we see enough lady goths in vests.  It’s daylight and she looks quite high in the tree yet slightly amused; like she’s going to let go at any moment and land on us in a ‘stacks on' type move.

3.4 out of 5 - Kann ich bitte ein größeres Foto?

trippingbecauseitsfree submitted this photo with the comment “A piece from my friends photography coursework :’)”
Ever wondered how many people have photography coursework that inspires them to take photos of their goth friends up trees? Wonder no more! If the hundreds* of photos that I am sent are any indication, the answer is: lots! I only took photos of my feet or my Barbies in bizarre homicide scenes because I didn’t know any friendly goths during my “photography” stage.   See what happens when you’re not friends with goths? TERRIBLE PHOTOS OF BARBIES.
This girl looks as if she’s just hanging out in her tree, looking pretty, observing wildlife. I particularly like her strawberry blonde hair colour and I’m a sucker for a velvet jacket. I think she’s a reasonable height up the tree.  She’s not smiling but it’s daylight, if a bit overcast.  I like all the spindly branches and fallen leaves, so bonus points there.
4 out of 5 - If you want to pass your photography course, befriend a goth
*Yes, I STILL have a back log of about 200 photos waiting to be posted. I’ll get to them all, I promise. 

trippingbecauseitsfree submitted this photo with the comment “A piece from my friends photography coursework :’)”

Ever wondered how many people have photography coursework that inspires them to take photos of their goth friends up trees? Wonder no more! If the hundreds* of photos that I am sent are any indication, the answer is: lots! I only took photos of my feet or my Barbies in bizarre homicide scenes because I didn’t know any friendly goths during my “photography” stage.   See what happens when you’re not friends with goths? TERRIBLE PHOTOS OF BARBIES.

This girl looks as if she’s just hanging out in her tree, looking pretty, observing wildlife. I particularly like her strawberry blonde hair colour and I’m a sucker for a velvet jacket. I think she’s a reasonable height up the tree.  She’s not smiling but it’s daylight, if a bit overcast.  I like all the spindly branches and fallen leaves, so bonus points there.

4 out of 5 - If you want to pass your photography course, befriend a goth

*Yes, I STILL have a back log of about 200 photos waiting to be posted. I’ll get to them all, I promise. 

Brooke submitted this photo with the comment “Hi I’m Brooke and I’m a plus size model.You can find me here www.starnow.com/missbee I was channelling Amy Lee in Evanescences “My Immortal” clip here :)”
I’ll admit I had to look up the My Immortal film clip to check out the veracity of the outfit claim because I’m not an Evanescence or nu-metal fan.  Inevitably, I got myself in a YouTube loop and ended up watching good old Chris Dane Owens (what a cracker - if only he were a goth and up a tree!)  Brooke’s outfit does appear to be the same as in the My Immortal filmclip so, well channelled!  She’s climbed quite high in a tree in order to sit and look upset.  What is she upset about? The latest Evanescence album? The fact that she doesn’t look all that goth and she’s out in the daylight? Did she splinter her wrists on the tree? Questions questions questions. 
2.65 out of 5 - Try not to splinter your wrists on trees because people might think you had an unfortunate accident with a razor-blade.

Brooke submitted this photo with the comment “Hi I’m Brooke and I’m a plus size model.You can find me here www.starnow.com/missbee I was channelling Amy Lee in Evanescences “My Immortal” clip here :)”

I’ll admit I had to look up the My Immortal film clip to check out the veracity of the outfit claim because I’m not an Evanescence or nu-metal fan.  Inevitably, I got myself in a YouTube loop and ended up watching good old Chris Dane Owens (what a cracker - if only he were a goth and up a tree!)  Brooke’s outfit does appear to be the same as in the My Immortal filmclip so, well channelled!  She’s climbed quite high in a tree in order to sit and look upset.  What is she upset about? The latest Evanescence album? The fact that she doesn’t look all that goth and she’s out in the daylight? Did she splinter her wrists on the tree? Questions questions questions. 

2.65 out of 5 - Try not to splinter your wrists on trees because people might think you had an unfortunate accident with a razor-blade.

DarkPink submitted this photo at least twice so I thought I’d post it once.
Wowsers!  What can I say about this? I don’t even know, other than there’s obviously a lot of passion going on here.  Passion for the tree? Passion for the ultimate up-tree pose? I’m unsure. I’m a tiny bit scared and a tiny bit amused but I’m sure that’s the desired response (or at least I hope that’s the desired response… let’s give them the benefit of the doubt).  There’s a lot of intensity in those eyes and she’s kind of baring her teeth like a wild thing. She certainly has a grip on that trunk.   My gut says ‘this is a goth taking the piss’ but how often do I listen to my gut?  Fairly frequently, if I think about it… currently it says ‘drink more alcohol, fiend’ but my brain says ‘you have to DJ at the gothclub at 12.30AM and you need to stay relatively sober for at least 4 hours in order to get dressed, made up, fix your hair into something resembling a stylish birds nest and get to the club. After that you can go crazy’.  My brain is such a spoil sport but my gut is hungry for alcohol.. just like this girl is hungry for, um, something….the photographer?
She’s not high up the tree from what I can see. It appears to be dark but not night time. She’s DEFINITELY not smiling.  Bonus points for passion.
4 out of 5 - There’s something very disturbing about looking into this girl’s eyes.

DarkPink submitted this photo at least twice so I thought I’d post it once.

Wowsers!  What can I say about this? I don’t even know, other than there’s obviously a lot of passion going on here.  Passion for the tree? Passion for the ultimate up-tree pose? I’m unsure. I’m a tiny bit scared and a tiny bit amused but I’m sure that’s the desired response (or at least I hope that’s the desired response… let’s give them the benefit of the doubt).  There’s a lot of intensity in those eyes and she’s kind of baring her teeth like a wild thing. She certainly has a grip on that trunk.   My gut says ‘this is a goth taking the piss’ but how often do I listen to my gut?  Fairly frequently, if I think about it… currently it says ‘drink more alcohol, fiend’ but my brain says ‘you have to DJ at the gothclub at 12.30AM and you need to stay relatively sober for at least 4 hours in order to get dressed, made up, fix your hair into something resembling a stylish birds nest and get to the club. After that you can go crazy’.  My brain is such a spoil sport but my gut is hungry for alcohol.. just like this girl is hungry for, um, something….the photographer?

She’s not high up the tree from what I can see. It appears to be dark but not night time. She’s DEFINITELY not smiling.  Bonus points for passion.

4 out of 5 - There’s something very disturbing about looking into this girl’s eyes.

artemisia-absinthium submitted this photo with no caption.
A fanged wench out in the daylight? She looks an awful lot like an older version of Claudia from the movie version of Interview with a Vampire but with breasts. I always wanted to be Claudia except for the obvious downside of physically remaining a child for eternity while you mature mentally.  This girl appears to have bridged that gap. I’m not going to go into the fact that this vampire is out in the daylight.  Perhaps she’s the *shudder* sparkly kind *runs screaming into the night*.  Wipe that thought from your brain, friends, I’m sure that’s not the case especially as she’s named her tumblr account after wormwood!
She doesn’t look very high up the tree and she’s out in the daylight. She’s more baring her fangs than smiling and extra points for invoking everyone’s favourite vampire child.
3.5 out of 5 - Bare your fangs up trees

artemisia-absinthium submitted this photo with no caption.

A fanged wench out in the daylight? She looks an awful lot like an older version of Claudia from the movie version of Interview with a Vampire but with breasts. I always wanted to be Claudia except for the obvious downside of physically remaining a child for eternity while you mature mentally.  This girl appears to have bridged that gap. I’m not going to go into the fact that this vampire is out in the daylight.  Perhaps she’s the *shudder* sparkly kind *runs screaming into the night*.  Wipe that thought from your brain, friends, I’m sure that’s not the case especially as she’s named her tumblr account after wormwood!

She doesn’t look very high up the tree and she’s out in the daylight. She’s more baring her fangs than smiling and extra points for invoking everyone’s favourite vampire child.

3.5 out of 5 - Bare your fangs up trees

Everette submitted this photo with no caption.
What a cute little Gothic Lolita we have here. In typical Loli fashion, the saccharine cuteness of her outfit, the lady-like pose, and the sinister look in her eye combines to make the whole image slightly disconcerting. Then again Lolis (especially non-EGL Lolis) generally make me feel a bit weird anyway.  Why are the clothes marketed to Lolis so damned expensive? Perhaps that’s the reason they always look so sinister - they’re secretly plotting ways to steal your wallet so they can afford the next Angelic Pretty or Baby, the Stars Shine Bright coat.  Eeeevil little Lolis.
Her outfit isn’t full on EGL but it’s still very cute. She is smiling and it’s daylight.
3.5 out of 5 -  hold on to your wallets

Everette submitted this photo with no caption.

What a cute little Gothic Lolita we have here. In typical Loli fashion, the saccharine cuteness of her outfit, the lady-like pose, and the sinister look in her eye combines to make the whole image slightly disconcerting. Then again Lolis (especially non-EGL Lolis) generally make me feel a bit weird anyway.  Why are the clothes marketed to Lolis so damned expensive? Perhaps that’s the reason they always look so sinister - they’re secretly plotting ways to steal your wallet so they can afford the next Angelic Pretty or Baby, the Stars Shine Bright coat.  Eeeevil little Lolis.

Her outfit isn’t full on EGL but it’s still very cute. She is smiling and it’s daylight.

3.5 out of 5 -  hold on to your wallets

Marc submitted this photo and said “Goth tree fishing. Whiskey and cigarettes as standard.”
I like how he didn’t state what the Goth was fishing for.  Trees? Compliments? Sunscreen? An ashtray? The Gothest fish of them all the Black Sole (which sadly doesn’t look all that Goth but has the Gothest name I could find)?
He is very pale and blonde and, I’m not going to lie, I love me a blonde Goth.  A person this blonde would, like me, have to be slathered in sunscreen and remain permanently in the shade, not for fear of getting a dreaded tan, but for fear of being burnt to a crisp, peeling like something that peels a lot and then going back to pale. This is very unhelpful in Summer but it’s just fantastic for being an uber goffick all the other time (but finding a foundation in this shade is a pain in the arse, let me tell you).  I’m glad this one hasn’t succumbed to the peer pressure in the Goth scene to dye his hair black.  FIGHT THE POWER. I dyed my hair black for 6 months and I quickly realised that very blonde regrowth on black hair isn’t pretty.  ENOUGH ABOUT ME.
3.5 out of 5 - Fight the power, fish for sunscreen.

Marc submitted this photo and said “Goth tree fishing. Whiskey and cigarettes as standard.”

I like how he didn’t state what the Goth was fishing for.  Trees? Compliments? Sunscreen? An ashtray? The Gothest fish of them all the Black Sole (which sadly doesn’t look all that Goth but has the Gothest name I could find)?

He is very pale and blonde and, I’m not going to lie, I love me a blonde Goth.  A person this blonde would, like me, have to be slathered in sunscreen and remain permanently in the shade, not for fear of getting a dreaded tan, but for fear of being burnt to a crisp, peeling like something that peels a lot and then going back to pale. This is very unhelpful in Summer but it’s just fantastic for being an uber goffick all the other time (but finding a foundation in this shade is a pain in the arse, let me tell you).  I’m glad this one hasn’t succumbed to the peer pressure in the Goth scene to dye his hair black.  FIGHT THE POWER. I dyed my hair black for 6 months and I quickly realised that very blonde regrowth on black hair isn’t pretty.  ENOUGH ABOUT ME.

3.5 out of 5 - Fight the power, fish for sunscreen.